Tuesday, April 28, 2009

My Shallow Response to your Shallow Request

Men are often seen as shallow, only wanting to date a woman for her physical appeal instead of the merrits and integrity of her character. Yet, in my opinion it is not only men whom are guilty of being superficial, but women as well.

I want to take as an example the following: A few weeks ago I met a friend's date who stated that she has friends that will only date a guy if he makes $100K+ aka only guys that have money1. Now since everyone has a right to set their standards, I want to set equally as demanding standards for that type of a girl.

That girl better be cute and sex better be good. Just as she would only continue to go out with the guy so long as he has money, expect that the guy will only continue to go out with her so long as she looks cute. Meaning if she gains weight because of not working out or taking care of herself, she will be out of the picture.

She should not expect marriage, because that would only unfairly give her some of the guy's money once he left her. For we know that as the guy gets older he may make more and more money, but as the girl gets older she will at some point start to look less and less cute. And looking less cute means that she will be out of the picture.

To put it diplomatically, if you make a blanket statement such as "I will only date guys who make $100K+ a year", then you are only a girl that money can buy. And as such that is exactly how you can expect to be treated.

Now a more reasonable request, is to say I want to be with someone who has good prospects, a college degree, a good head on their shoulders, a decent job, has their act together and in the future has the potential to be better off than they are today. Someone I can sit down with and have a decent conversation I can enjoy. And then that person will have the right to ask what do you have to offer to the relationship? Are you college educated? Can you hold your own in an intelligent conversation?

We each have our standards of what we want an ideal boyfriend / girlfriend to look like and be like, there is nothing wrong with that, but if all you can think about are material and physical appeal you are truly setting yourself up for failure because anyone can loose their appeal and then what will you be left with? I can tell you one thing for sure, it wont be happiness.

1 :Statistically speaking, only about 6% of the entire US population
individually earn over $100K (go to wikipedia.org and look up census personal income in the U.S.).